To Each Their Own Journey

I’ve had the privilege of working with incredible mentors over the past few years. Each and every single one has gifted me with invaluable pearls of wisdom. For this, I am eternally grateful.

Among these pearls, I now recognize, was always a common theme: It’ll all be OK in the end. One way or another, they recount to me the inconceivable ways their lives seemed to take all the wrong turns when, in fact, in retrospect, it was actually all the right turns they were forced to take in order for them to achieve their current successes. Each and every ebb and valley gifted them opportunities to flourish. With a sprinkle of patience, another of perseverance, and always, with the Will of God, it’ll all be OK in the end.

No state is permanent. Whether it’s one of pain or grief or happiness or triumph. They, just like the nature of this life, are temporary. So this begs the question, why freak out over everything when with time, it shall all pass?

In the space of two days I had gotten into 3 car accidents. Minor, no casualties, except for the bumper of a silver 4×4 Hyundai. I was upset, I realized, for a multitude of reasons. To begin, I didn’t understand why this was happening. Was it because I was being careless? I didn’t believe so. Was it because my driving skills were rusty? Possible, but I drove just fine on other occasions over the course of the week with no apparent complications. I just couldn’t put my finger on it, which bred frustration. I was also upset over the inconvenience I caused the owner of the car I hit, even though we agreed I would pay for the damages. I wished I was careful enough that this didn’t have to happen to anyone. I felt bad that my dad was the one paying for the mess I made. All in all, it’s an unpleasant experience. I am learning how to navigate a situation where I am at fault. Not fun. But like every other unpleasant experience or crisis I have faced in the past, and will likely continue to face, this too, shall pass. And from it, I will learn.

My final year of training as a medical student is slowly coming to a close. I find myself at loss with the magnitude of the decisions that await me over the next few months. The variables are too many and far too complex for me to control, let alone comprehend. Years of relentless hard work, emotional and existential crises, tumbling and building of my self-confidence, as I grew into the shoes of Physician, all culminate into the moment my residency training program is given to me. The very thought is anxiety-provoking.

I know, in my heart of hearts, that this too, shall pass.

I find solace in the knowledge that although I know not what the future holds, my Creator does. Although I know not what is best for me in this Dunya, my Lord does. Although my power and control over any situation is limited, I know He is the All Powerful and Most Knowledgeable. I do my part, and I release my greatest worries, anxieties, and insecurities onto the Most Loving Listener. In this, I find comfort.

So I pray. Not for a specific outcome per say, but I pray from my heart of hearts to the One who Knows All and Who Knows Best to grant me what is best for me in this life, and the next, in everything that I do.

I pray that the path chosen for me be one that is close to my heart. One that will bring me abundant love, happiness, and flagrant success in this Dunya and the next.

I pray that I as well as those closest to my heart are guided to their own respective paths towards greatness.

I pray that everything I do be for His sake, so that I may leave a meaningful mark in this world, a legacy,  before my departure. For life is short, and my mission and ambition too grand.

“O Allah! I ask You for Your Love and the love of those who love You, and for the love of every action which will bring me closer to Your Love!”