Hello Dr. H*,
My name is S. Z. I am the Med-1 student you kicked out of the small group today for being 30 minutes late.
The reason I was late was because the metro broke down (the yellow line and then the green line). However, you did not even give me ten seconds to allow me to explain myself. Instead, you scolded me in a whisper, grabbed my arm in a semi-aggressive manner, and angrily ushered/threw me out of the library, in front of the entire class. I was humiliated for being 30 minutes late. I have never been so disrespected.
What made me feel worse is that I arrived with a colleague who was also stuck in the metro because it broke down (we met on the green line), and yet I was the only one kicked out. I felt singled out, as you may imagine.
I apologize for my tardiness, however, I also feel that I should have at the very least been given the chance to explain. I understand the value of punctuality, and I have a stellar record for attendance and being on time. Should you wish to verify this, you may speak to our administrative coordinator.
Furthermore, I have great respect for your work, and I come to school to learn, and I love it. I do not understand what was gained by kicking me out and humiliating me in such a manner.
I pray that no other student should ever suffer the same indignity.
(Note: Names have been changed to protect the privacy of the persons involved.)
I decided not to display his email for fear of breaching privacy rights. Otherwise I would have much bigger problems on hand.
The physician in question replied stating that he discussed our interaction with his colleagues and acknowledged that it must have been a painful experience for me.
Like, no kidding?!??
He claimed that what he did was not directed at me personally.
I am pretty easy to spot though. Just think: no hijabi present. Then hijabi appears. Camouflaging like my colleague did was simply not possible in such a small group, you know? For what it’s worth, I don’t think what he did was personal in nature. Despite this, just thinking of what happened makes me livid. Even if he had to kick me out, there were at least 20 more appropriate ways of doing it. What he did was wrong, and yet the email did not contain a sincere apology for what he did (he only felt sorry I felt the way that I did).
He explained that he just wanted to keep the teaching process on track…
As if my presence would have completely halted the blasted workshop.
I never replied.
This is what I learned:
Life happens. Sometimes it’s not fun. Nevertheless, take it all head on .
Stand up for yourself in the most polite and constructive ways you can concoct. That way, nobody can say you’re at fault, even if you were wronged.
Never let something emotionally jagging wound your confidence. Deal with unfortunate situations confidently, and keep moving forward.
Don’t let yourself wallow in self-pity. That never got anyone anywhere. Flash a smile of defiance to what this dunya (world) throws at you, and keep marching on.